Death....Grief....Death....Grief

:( :( :(  It's totally a sad thing... Some peeps take them easily and calmly but peeps like me take it as a burden and as a saddest part of their life when it comes to their family members, their friends and their loved ones...
For me Death & Grief is the one element that I hate most in life, not afraid of me departing but my loved ones whom I would cherish forever....

Since the death of my little brother and my Granny 11 years ago, I would continuously say this prayer till now: "Lord, Please depart me first before others whom I loved", this is the only weapon that keeps my faith and my inner most feelings stronger as days past afraid of someone being death.....
I can't and i won't take the death of my love ones as a trial from GOD which I should, cause my feeling's and my soul is not strong enough to withstand the feeling of one's death...
Thru enough this week my heart had to pass many deaths...

1) On the way for my practicals late last week, I encountered death at the shoulder of the road, a guy lying down there, death + intracranial Hemorrhage due to the force on the hea, there were no sign of accident or anything, it just occur like that... For thruout the day my mood was darken and blacken with this tragic incident....

2) Last night one of my friend called only to say that one of our course mate had died in her sleep at her hostel.. she was my junior, I don't really know her, and yet still I felt like Arghghghghhghghghghghghgh.........

3) Earlier this morning, my friend text me, that one of our Ex- secondary school teacher had passed away this morning.........................................................

4) Later in the night, my aunt called and told that one of my mom's childhood friend had passed away too today.....

5) Japan & Burma's Earthquake which might had cost Thousands of life..........................................

Well, this is all GOD's plan but to this one and only of his plan I can't agree with which I should agree....!

"God, please give me the courage to face one's death as easy as accepting one's life, and I also pray that if possible depart me first before my loved ones, I know I'm acting selfishly, but I can't help it Lord, AMEN"

R.I.P my dear friends & Loved ones!

Thanks @ Reading

Wanna Steal...???

Hahahahahahaha......
Peace Guys, How are you...???
Wanna share some dropouts here....hehe..

Last week I went to the Cybercafe to print some assignments.. (my printer is working, but lazy to use), I'd saved the documents inside my external Hard Disk.....

I said to him "Bang, nak print", then he said okay... after instructing him which one to be printed, he continued surfing his laptop as usual before I came, so I thought he has some job to be done... Okay, So while waiting for my print, I smell something fishy in this fellow, like he's trying to copy something from my hard disk because when the paper had finished he took a long time to reload it, then when the print had finish, he took a long time to packed it and give it to me plus he went at the back of the shop doing unnecessary work which aren't related....

So, I acted cool, like nothing I've wondered, but my heart still tells till now that he'd copied some folder from my hard disk.  Anyway I quickly took my print and got out from the shop... Later at night while pondering over and over again, I realized and confirmed that he had copied the folder named "BARE BARU" hahaha... Don't worry it's all movies in this folder, cause he might thought that, It's kinda an "interesting" folder so he'd copied.... Wakakakakakaka... thinking of it again it would make me laugh tremendously.....hahahaha.....thinking of how silly & slammed he'd be if he'd copied those folder....

Winky Wink

Thanks @ Reading...!!!
 

Hell Of A Day........ Yet An Enjoyable One...!!!

Well....
Wasssuupp Guys and a very warm welcome to all my beloved readers out there (If there's any) Haha...
Before I start my "Like-Daily-Diary" stories... here's a glimpse of a joke

A young and stupid pilot wanted to sound cool on the aviation frequencies.
So, this one time he was approaching a field during the night time.
Instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said: "Guess who?"
The controller switched the field lights off and replied: "Guess where!"

 P/S : It's gonna be a huge disaster when u hear an ATC sounds like that someday...

Aites lets get on track...

As usual started my day off at 5.00 a.m with a quick and nice bath, headed off for my practical to Bukit Raja, Besut via the college shuttle bus. Was damn sleeeeepy in the bus yet couldn't doze off... Settled practicals at 12 noon then headed back to panji (one of MUCH hostels)

Now the story begins here:

Called my Dad to fetch me up from panji, but he said that he's working... How am I supposed to get back??? Arghghghghghghgh....

All I could think of is to walked and get a cab back....

So, I walked till the front street hoping to catch a cab, but none... so I just continued walking walking walking & walking till at one point I thought to myself " I'm not going to take a cab and I'm going to walk all way till my house which was like more than 10km (not sure bout the distance)Hehehe

I was walking with my pure white uniform, a backpack, a hand held book and my breakfast cup.. like an Id**t I was... but who cares right??

All I could pray and hope was for a good weather, and a strong leg muscles....

continued walking till I reached my house and to my surprise it took me literally 45 minutes of walking....

I was damn tired and bloody-sweaty...goshhhhhh........

Thinking again, how the heck I managed to walk damn far and reached my destination... was actually a shocking one for me... until now I still can't digest my thoughts of how I did it but one thing I'm really clear of that God had held me and carried me throughout my whole journey and it was truly a journey of self-trustworthiness, faith & confidence.

P/S: Actually I wasn't tired at all...!!!

Thanks @ Reading...!!!

Simply Dreaming...!!!

Close your eyes and spread your wings.
Make a wish and dream good dreams.
Don't ever say, you'll never tell.
Cause life is short and very frail.
Just be still and take a look.
Before you know it, you'll be hooked.
Then once in a blink of an eye
you'll soon realize it was all a lie.
Up you look and there they're gone.
Why two days feel so long?
What was once there has disappeared.
Now, love is the one thing to fear.
Why say go when it was no?
You open your eyes only to find,
what lied there was your sign.
So close your eyes and spread your wings.
Make a good wish and LIVE your dreams!

Thanks @ Reading

Amigos...!!!

People come into our life disguised as angels, and sometimes angels come into our life disguised as people. It is possible to see God anywhere. All it takes are open eyes and ears and the willingness to see miracles. They are everywhere. God is as available as we are. Having friends that inspire us to rise to higher and greater levels is an awesome gift. Surround yourself with people that inspire you to do better and inspire your friends as well. It is a profound truth that the people we spend time with shape the path that we travel. 

Thanks @ Reading

My Secret Promise...!!!

I ran in blessed drizzle,
I walked across the silver desserts.
I dived under golden sun gleams, and
I passed thousand of seas;
To get to the Seven Gates.
Sometimes I was lost in a crowd
But I felt your love’s power
Pulling me towards you all the time.
Will we be able to survive together?
For this world is a flaring place
But I’ll gladly take the chance, for
You are the only one I love till eternity.
I stopped, and saw the empty skies above,
A graveyard with a newly buried couple,
A dark cloud wandering lonely.
But the silver line in it,
Manifested the diamond necklace I gave you.
Then came a fresh breeze
I felt your sweet voice and divine aroma in it.
So I saw you in a sea of roses,
In a blossoming bud,
In a luminous sunbeam,
In a fragrant wind,
And then everywhere.
Suddenly there were colors and songs in the atmosphere.
An angel was sprinkling magical dust
A cupid was shooting arrows of flowers.
My heart leaped out
For I saw my Cinderella…………
She’s a divine Goddess, I was feared to touch.
She had lit a lamp for me
But I was the one who burnt all the time.
She does not know…………………………
Her voice filled my vacant ears,
Her magical eyes stung in my heart,
Her glittering smile made hole in me.
She was my secret promise…………..
The flames that burned in my heart,
Now have become caressing petals.
I removed my heart and gave to her,
She wore it in her wedding finger.

Thanks @ Reciting

Ash Wednesday...!!!

Ash Wednesday is a sacred and holy day celebrated by all christians around the world as it marks the first day of Lent.. It's a day where we should realize and repent and start to pray asking for God's forgiveness for all the sins that we've committed and continue to repent and pray faithfully till we're gone...

The whole purpose is to mourn, repent, fast and pray, and find your way to the Lord to attain forgiveness through which one gets eternal life!

Remember, O man, that you are dust, and unto dust you shall return." this verse in the Holy Bible reminds us of who we are and where we came from... we are just made of dust and to dust we shall return when we're dead.. so there's no use at all having much possessions and money yet not sharing them with the less fortunate cause we can't bring them along but we can bring our good deeds and our faith along....

So, happy fasting month to all christians out there.. pray and keep your faith for we're the ambassadors of Christ

Remember, O man, that you are dust, and unto dust you shall return." ~ Genesis 3:19

Thanks @ Reading...!!!

Diary Dated 8th March 2011...!!!

Diary Dated 8th March:  Totally a disaster day and no one would want to start their day like how I did.
I was totally out of mood went i left for college that morning because of some issues took place the night before, so I was totally moody and you would not want to pull words with me cause I might blast you off the face...

Anyway, I reached college 5 minutes before class and you know what?  There's a practical exam today and oh Shitttt, here I am out of mood plus my mind is somewhere else, how am I gonna sit for the practical exam....Goshhhh....  now it's totally a chain of event that would eventually lead to a whole lot of disaster....

I literally spoke to anyone that day even to my lecturers.... when I got off the car and was walking towards the lab, my friends approach me but I just smiled at them and walk off which I would never do on my normal days where I would sit and talk to them, laugh and even crack jokes.... all of them were like "Nick what happen? why you're like this? this is not the person I use to know.... I miss your smile, your laughter, your humor and whatsoever 'your' they could possibly think of.... Pondering on that again, I felt so bad for treating them like that, but I cant help it at that time (no one could)...

Then my lecturer asked the whole class to write a Musculoskeletal Assessment format, which was part of the practical marks... then it's time for practicals...... Hell Off.. I did like Shitttt... you can bet I was like an idiot standing infront of my lecturer answering none except for one of his questions.... can you imagine???
Even my lecturer was shocked and asked me " whats happening to you? any problem? you did not write your assessment well either"... I said nothing except silence.. then again he asked me, then I told him "nothing sir, i'm okay, but it's not a good morning today and totally not a good day, I'm having some problems".. then he began advising me and so on... at last I said " thank you sir" and walk off the lab and separated myself from the rest.. wanted to be alone... was damn sad and frustrated with my performance just now.....
Anyway, true enough I was like that for the whole day... none approach me to asked anything... all they did was just asking me Why Why and Why???

It hurts till now, of how my mind affects my life and my performance and for not doing well in my practicals, I even cried after the practical exam.... It's like an Auto-Immune disease where your own guard cells eats your body up....

Thanks @ Reading...!!!

Why Change The World If Yourself Are Unchanged...!!!

Why Change The World If Yourself Are Unchanged!
This is a short phrase yet contains bombastic and deep meaning....
I want to share a story with my fellow readers here about a man who changed the world for his sake, but literally changed himself.

There was a millionaire who was bothered by severe eye pain.  He consulted so many physicians and consumed heavy loads of drugs.  But the ache persisted.  At last a monk who was supposed to be an expert in treating such patients was called in.

The monk understood his problems and said that for some time he should concentrate only on green colors and not on any colors.  The millionaire directed that every object his eyes is likely to see, to be painted in green color.


When the monk came to visit him after a few days, the millionaire's servant ran buckets of green paints and poured on him since he was in saffron dress, lest their master see any other color.  Hearing this the monk laughed and said " If only you had purchased a pair of Green Spectacles, worth just a few dollars, you could have saved these walls and trees and could have saved a large share of his fortune "

From the above story that you've read, what can you conclude?

See do not bother changing one's cloth if yours has not been changed.

We always throw or spit blames on others even when we're at fault, if u take a moment reflecting on the person you hate most (your enemy) trying to see the beauty of that person beyond their evil look, see the good things in them rather than the bad things, this will make you to appreciate their presence around you.

If a sinner or wrong-doers or if a person had done something wrong seeks your help, Do not to cast him away and yet speak to him, show your affection towards him or just lent him your ears... make him to repent and to straighten up his life.. But if you cast him, he's just going to continue his old bad routines.

Transformed yourself first and the world will be transformed according to your will......!!!

Thannks @ Reading...!!!